Give me a well-trained tongue that has been born out of silent listening in the sanctuary of my heart. May my words become love in the lives of others. ~Macrina Wiederkehr
I whisper this aspiration to myself when I’m preparing to speak to a group, or about to have what might be a challenging conversation. I try to remember it even when I’m just chatting with a friend. When I was a child, we learned the rhyme “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” Sorry, but that is just not always true. Over my many years, I can vividly remember words that stung and crushed. And words that encouraged and embraced. A more accurate sentiment might be this Bible verse: “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it and indulge it will eat its fruit and bear the consequences of their words.”
When my kids were growing up, I always asked them at the end of the year what their best memories were, and what they wanted or were looking forward to in the new year. I was caught up short one year when my youngest daughter said that what she wanted for the new year was for me to not yell so much. Convicted. I stopped yelling.
One of the great things about having grandchildren is that you get a chance to do things better. I have never yelled at my grandchildren. Yes, I have corrected when needed and imposed consequences when appropriate. But always, I hope, with words of love, encouragement, and appreciation for the wonderful beings that they are. I try to always be quick to lift them up, inspire them, express confidence in them, and more than anything, to let them know that they are loved beyond the limits of description.
Speaking the blessing is not just for those we know and love. We have so many opportunities to acknowledge someone’s value, giving thanks for a service provided, reflecting an admired quality we see in someone, offering a smile and kind word to someone having a bad day. Even asking someone the usual question “how are you” and meaning it, paying attention to the response, connecting even for a moment in passing, can make a difference in someone’s life.
We can be like Johnny Appleseed, sowing seeds of blessing with our words that will germinate into blossoms of love.
Great blog — do you know where in the bible this is — “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it and indulge it will eat its fruit and bear the consequences of their words.”
Thanks Esther. Yes, Proverbs 18:21.
Your thoughts on grandchildren are so correct. Our three are blessings that haven’t stopped giving, even as one prepares to go to college in the fall, and the other two are in high school….when did that happen?
We are so thankful we live so close and see them at least once a week. At the speed at which they are becoming young adults and will move on to their own lives, every moment we get to spent together is such a treat.
Speaking of which, we are off to see our youngest in a soccer game tonight!
Hope the game goes well. I’ve been busy attending my grandson’s basketball games lately. They do grow up fast! Another grandchild expected in a few weeks, so getting to start again with all the fun. Thanks for commenting, Bob.