Talk less, listen more
Judge less, love more
A mantra is a word or short phrase that focuses your attention. It can be a sacred mantra that connects you to the divine. It can be a brief, inspiring quote. It can be a reminder or guide to keep you focused on what is most important to you.
Lately, I’ve been using a mantra that I came up with myself to help me stay centered in the midst of a challenging situation involving someone I care about very much. When, in my own opinion, I was unfairly characterized, my instinct was to defend myself, to convince the other person that I am not as they were describing me. I realized, however, in this particular situation that my defensive reaction was not helpful. (Is it ever?) Instead, I started reminding myself to talk less and listen more. Hence the first part of the mantra: Talk less, listen more.
I also realized that while I was feeling unfairly judged myself, I was at the same time judging the other person. Hmm. An oracle card I drew counseled me to distance myself from lower vibrations. Yes, I thought smugly, this other person is operating at a lower frequency right now. I don’t want to be around that. And then…you can guess…I realized that the lower vibrations were my own. Damn. The other person was doing nothing to me. I was suffering in my own narrative of hurt feelings and mistreatment, feelings that I mistakenly blamed the other person for. Judging lowers our vibration because it blocks the expansive and transcendent grace of love, love for myself and love for others. Hence the second part of the mantra: Judge less, love more.
I now have a sticky notes with my mantra on my computer and elsewhere, so that I see it often. It helps me be more self-aware, not just in the situation that inspired it, but throughout my life. When I am talking too much instead of listening, when I am judging instead of loving, it provides a quick reset and releases the anxiety that urges me to speak and the fear that urges me to judge. It reconnects me to the quiet center in my heart, and all is well.
Do you currently have a mantra you find helpful? If not, can you think of one that might be useful? Hope you will share your thoughts in the comments.
Can I borrow yours? Eight words that can make everything better.
Ha ha! Yes, of course, Bob. In fact you don’t need to borrow it; you can just have it. And give it to others. Love you!
great reminder – set your intention day by day, moment by moment
mine
May I be kind while in service to others
Lovely. Thanks, Esther. And yes, it is a day by day, moment by moment practice, at least for me!
Galen, I agree with Bob…I’d like to borrow your mantra, too! We all have messages that we play and replay in our minds. This post made me realize I need to do a thorough “housecleaning” on those recurring thoughts. Some need to be tossed and others kept. Thanks Galen!
Well said, Pam. It’s like having a junk drawer in our mind that hasn’t been cleaned out in years. And you are welcome to have the mantra — no need to borrow it!