A person at birth is soft and gentle
At death is hard and unyielding
Sprouting plants are tender and supple
At death are brittle and dry
Stiff and unyielding are associated with death
Soft and gentle with life
The wisdom in this chapter is easy to understand from our own observations. Babies learning to walk fall a lot, yet they are rarely injured. Their bones are flexible and they are relaxed in their efforts. An older person is sometimes unsteady on their feet. They are afraid of falling because falls often result in broken bones or serious injury.
I also experience the truth of this chapter when practicing martial arts. People believe that muscular strength is the key to success, but there is always someone stronger. Using force based on muscle strength is easily defeated. I watched an 80 year old tai chi master, small in stature with a little pot belly, deflect attacks from young, buff, highly skilled kung fu teachers. He stood calm and relaxed as his opponents, some of whom towered over him, tried to grab him. With a barely detectable shift in stance and a subtle movement of his hands or wrists, he sent his attackers flying across the room.
Where did that power come from? From being relaxed and centered, yielding and fluid, opening up the channels of energy that move freely when not blocked. From being unafraid, fully present, and responsive rather than reactive. He didn’t meet force with force but rather allowed force to pass by him as he remained unaffected.
What I noticed the most was that he was having a great time. He was always smiling. And at the end of the practice, he was not even breathing hard.
Not all of us practice martial arts, but all of us encounter conflict in our lives. How do we respond? When we are rigid in our opinions, when we insist on being right, when we try to force others to comply with our demands, or to conform to our expectations, we invite resistance. We feed the energy of division and hostility.
If you are a parent or a teacher, you have no doubt heard the excuse “She started it! I had no choice.” And we have probably heard that plenty of times from adults too. But what this chapter teaches is that we always have a choice – the energy of life or the energy of death.
So think about it. What does the energy of life look like in a particular situation? It’s not always exactly the same because it is always open and receptive, responsive to the moment. It is fluid, adaptable, alert, appropriate.
Next time conflict arises, try to be aware of how you engage with it. No need to be judgmental, just curious. Learn about yourself. Then make your choice.
I could see peace instead of this. ~A Course in Miracles
Galen, I do want to be open, receptive, and responsive in the moment. The moment, the here and now, is all we truly have. Thank you for your words that cemented my longing.
Blessings!
This sent me inside myself, searching. The desire for change is there.
Choice is what it is all about. I do know that we can choose not to be angry, confrontational and other emotions. We have the ability to choose and control.
I like the thought of being relaxed doing it and perhaps even smiling while make the better choice.
Thanks for the enlightenment!
Blessings and hugs!
Yes indeed, Martha. Now is all we have. The Tao Te Ching teaches us to be fully present and appropriately responsive to the reality of this moment. Thanks for commenting.
That's wonderful, Linda. It all begins with a willingness and a curiosity to see what is really happening, to observe without judgment our own engagement. Thanks for your comment.
LeAnn, I learn so much from watching those who really embody these principles. If we are not choosing what opens our hearts and brings peace to our spirits, we can always make a better choice. Thanks for your comment.
I really enjoyed reading your thoughts on this one. I know many that need to read and relate to this one. I have tried to remain centered and keep my focus on Christ and what he would have me do. I am sure it is to not be contentious, but relaxed and centered.
Thanks for your thoughts on this one.
Blessings and hugs!
I appreciate your additional thoughts on this post. Thanks, LeAnn.